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/s/ - Stream of Consciousness

What are you feeling?
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Stories about your experience with depression and mental illness

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You don't, you're destined to be alone forever and so am I


I was in your position a few years ago. My first suggestion would be to go seek professional help if you have the recourses ofc! If not, I found volunteering helped to build my social skills and be more confident, it also gave me a routine and something to look forward to. Again, this really depends if you have access to it or the spare time. I hope this helped a little, and didn't come off as patronising.


I can vouch for volunteering helping a ton. Not only did it get me out of my shell a fair bit, I made a few good friends doing it


thank you all i really appreciate the advice

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why am I so fucking anxious over literally nothing what the fuck


Whenever you are anxious about something, what do you think of? Concentrate on them and you will find what is missing from your life.


No, sounds anxiety disorder. See professional help.


Maybe you have agoraphobia idk

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I cannot seem to choose between living a normal happy life where I feel like I'm doing nothing or living a life of tears and pain where I can actually do something useful
Now that I explicitly typed it out in a full sentence it seems blatantly obvious that no sane man should be capable of choosing between these things
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I hear you mate. I know I'm not alone in this.
But it sure damn well constantly feels like you're alone


With all this nauseous amount of information getting in the brain, some kind of mental cleansing is needed. Forcing yourself to patiently observe simple activities works for me. Taking a calm walk in a park/forest, cooking, doing physical exercises or whatever else suit you. I also meditate if my head feels like a boulder, it does help, but if you're going for it - make it regular, otherwise you'll just ineffectively grasp the small portion.
Being with a bunch of people doesn't really mean you will feel less lonely. I can only have fun with few close friends. I don't even know if I want to be around others. Besides, not everyone who's alone is lonely. It's a matter of perspective, I guess.


I've been alone for a really long time in my life. It does get lonely at some point.
You get over it, but you feel it multiple times at some points


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Are you sure you still want to be alone then? Was this your decision? I get that you can experience depression either way, but if you are suffering for the wrong cause, you will end up hating yourself. For most of my life I was surrounded by people, yet never felt nothing but loneliness. On the other hand, being alone for me is more lively and peaceful. I can't be 100% open even with my family, so I try to find pals to chat with on the Wired. Isolation can be crazy, but it's necessary to embrace that state of mind rather than fight it just because it never stops. If you accept your mad genie, there will be no need to fight it afterwards.
"A man is born alone and dies alone…"


I've done both. I decided semi-recently I should stop being alone. And I see the fun in not being alone again. But at the same time I also immediately see how being tied to other people's schedules makes me miss out on time spent on my own things as well. It's a bit of give and take no matter which way you choose really. But I've never been open and comfortable with anyone in my entire life outside of the internet. The few times I did either lead to people distancing from me, or I was just hanging out in seedy bars at 3-4 in the morning surrounded by people that hear the things come out of your mouth and begrudgingly understand what it's like to be a bit fucked.

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